No one ever told me
That life would be this lonely,
That the rain outside
Is nothing compared to the tears
That fall from my eyes,
That the lightning that breaks
Through the darkness
Is nothing compared to the cracks
In my heart. No one ever told
Me that life would be so sad,
That I’d start to rot from within.
That I’d start to hate myself.
But then I suppose I was naive.
Too young to realise that my dream
Could only ever be that,
I come from a broken family,
A rundown, poor town.
I found my Mother after she’d tried
To commit suicide, called an ambulance
And helped get her back on her feet again.
I lived off food from relatives
And food banks. I buried my baby
Brother after he’d been born dead.
I tried to escape but wound
Up more trapped than ever before,
Crawling back pitifully.
And now I’m alone again,
And it really hurts.
I just don’t see the point
If all this, it never can get
Better. I’m just not good enough.
Everything is so shit,
And I’m almost out of fucks
To give. I’m done.
I wanted to confess,
To tell you everything that makes
My mind run a million miles,
Why I cannot stop wishing
For time that’s gone by.
I wanted to offer my regrets
One last time to plague me,
Before they fly away from my addled
But I couldn’t find the words,
I just couldn’t do it,
So I shall be tormented
For yet another night. Help me,
Please! How can I confess
Everything and make it right.
I can’t do it
I do not know if you will
Even seen this, I really pray
That you do! The money may be
Worse, the spelling of the
Students beyond bad, but please
I beg, return. Not for my heart,
Which beats slower and with sadness
In its depth, come back because
Everything else is falling apart…
No respect, responsibility has
Flown the nest, so have you. Be
The saviour, save us all, you never
Know it might be a ball…I doubt it
But still, please come back, then
Perhaps this turbulant world will
Become hushed and normality,
Happiness can resume.
I have to say it’s been a trying day,
It’s been hard, fast and gone in a flash.
I wouldn’t mind but I tend to find
The work confounds me more, until such a time
My morale has fallen and gone through the floor.
Right now I need you, my guardian angel to send me
A message, a sign that you’re there? Please?
A little sign that you care?
It’s the first time I’ve thought of you in a while,
And when I do it makes me smile…at least three,
Perhaps four months have passed, please help me
Make my morale last?